by Dr. Neinstein
The Paradox of Leadership
I like to think of life as a game, I mean, I could think of the grim, the fire and brimstone, the mundane but quite frankly where is the fun in that. As a young man I was solely devoted and dedicated to becoming a scientist then a doctor, then a surgeon, then a plastic surgeon. This was an all-consuming endeavor that I was obsessed with, likely even obsessively compelled with. I immersed myself completely in the pursuit of knowledge and skill for my chosen profession. There was no book I would not read or a surgeon to learn from that I would not seek out. When I entered into private practice to share my life’s work with the world, I quickly realized that my ability to practice medicine would require a whole new set of skills. I was no longer in a vacuum of me the books and the study of surgery. I was recruiting, training, mentoring, disciplining, rewarding a team. I would have to become a leader of people in order to properly practice the art of plastic surgery.
I mentioned above thinking about life as a game. I am now in a phase where the game of leadership and the pursuit of knowledge and skills of becoming a leader is incredibly fun and rewarding. Seeing those on your team flourish personally and professionally gives me immense joy almost like watching your own children grow up.
That being said I have some musings over the qualities of a leader that I have been wrestling with recently and I am interested in what others in similar situations think.
In my mind leadership requires two pillars of skills. Interestingly, they are essentially opposite in nature creating an interesting paradox. On one side of the paradox is discipline and the other is the ability to change or adapt.
Lets start with discipline
“Would you have a great empire? Rule over yourself.”
― Publilius Syrus
Nearly anything we want, however you want it, whenever you want it is now available in our modern society. As I read through the trials and tribulations of the stoic philosophers through Ghandi, Napoleon, Churchill, I think about how little they had available at their fingertips. At the same time I look around and do not feel as though all of these things available has made the world a better place or made being a leader much easier.
One of my all time favorite presidents Dwight D. Eisenhower famously once said “Freedom is the opportunity for self-discipline.” The second of the cardinal virtues discusses self-restraint. This is an ancient and timeless law of the universe. You can read any biblical or historical book and this topic will be covered one way or another
In essence without emotional and physical discipline from the leader of any organization, the organization itself risks ruin, dependency, imbalance, tumultuous times.
So how do I implement discipline in my life
I think about this
“no one is fit to rule who is not first master of themselves”
– Seneca
Or as Ice Cube once said “check yo’ self before you wreck yo’ self”
I start by waking early and attacking the day. For me this is 430am because it gives me a few hours to treat my body and mind rigorously so it will not let me down later in the day. Reading everyday has been essential to my growth. I like to remember that everything I am going through someone in history has gone through it so I would be letting my team down if I did not learn from their triumphs or losses. I go to bed early which allows the brain to rest and recharge. In terms of diet I practice moderation I do not want to live a life of complete restriction in the joys of food but find a blend of moderation that works.
By being relentless with my self discipline I become more tolerant of others, having a bedrock to lean on I am more able to absorb the trials and tribulations of those on my team and around me and keep the ship heading in the proper direction at the same time.
Lets look at the other side of the paradox because no matter how thin you slice bread there is always two sides. In Robert Green’s epic book on the laws of power his last law basically says throw out all the other 47 and assume formlessness. By taking formidable and predictable shape and being rigid you are easy to read and therefore opening you and your organization up to sabotage, competitors, mutiny, and the worse of all hubris. Countless examples in history from Sparta and the malleable to Athenians to Sears rigidity and Sam Walton’s adaptability.
Bruce Lee was a rare person. From teenage delinquent to actor, father, teacher and a truly epic philosopher. His famous saying “be like water”. In his daughter Shannon’s reflection on her father in her book “Be Water, My Friend” she discusses how water can flow or it can crash. While water is soft and pliable it can also be a tsunami depending on its shape. She muses that to keep moving forward in life you need to be adaptable and willing to nimbly shift in beliefs and actions.
The late Queen of England was known to utter around Buckingham Palace “For things to stay the same they must change”, meaning in order to maintain the status, success, values people hold dear they must adapt and adapt quickly to the changing world.
Our lessons in life will paid for in time or money you will have to choose and it will likely cost you both if you are not fixated on nimble adaptability. Circumstances will repeat themselves in your personal life and professional life. Not the exact same circumstance but silos of events. If you are not willing to change your behavior in these circumstances you will not alter the outcome. The crazy thing is that when you improve in one aspect it will alter the course or path of your personal or professional life and therefore a new problem or issue that would not have occurred in the past path will come up and what is even crazier than crazy is that new issue may be even worse than if you had not learned anything two steps back. That, however is the game of life and if you want to win you better get used to it because as Churchill once said “success is just going from failure to failure with enthusiasm”
Best,
Dr Neinstein